Wiljack Collection

  There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him.

  An angel hears his plea and appears to him.
  "Sorry, but you can’t take your wealth with you."
  The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules.

  The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him.

  The angel reappears and informs the man that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed.

  Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven to greet St. Peter.

  Seeing the suitcase St. Peter says,
  "Hold on, you can’t bring that in here!"

  But, the man explains to St. Peter that he has permission and asks him to verify his story with the Lord. Sure enough, St. Peter checks and comes back saying,
  "You’re right. You are allowed one carry-on bag, but I’m supposed to check its contents before letting it through."

  St. Peter opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that the man found too precious to leave behind and exclaims,
  "You brought pavement?!!!"

Kids truly say the most endearing things. Here are some actual letters from children addressed to God.

Dear God,

Are you really invisible or is that just a trick?

Lucy (age 6)

Dear God,

Did you mean for giraffes to look like that or is that an accident?

Norma (age 4)

Dear God,

Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don’t you just keep the ones you got now?

Jane (age 5)

Dear God,

I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that ok?

Paul (age 7)

Dear God,

I am American. What are you?

Dylan (age 6)

Dear God,

I want to be just like Daddy when I grow up but not with so much hair.

Ronan (age 5)

Dear God,

I bet it’s hard for you to love everyone in the world. I have four people in my family and I can’t do it.

Mike (age 6)

Dear God,

Thank you for the baby brother but I asked for a puppy.

Raoul (age 4)

Dear God,

If you watch in Church on Sunday, I will show you my new shoes.

Jennifer (age 5)

Dear God,

If we come back as something else, please don’t let me be Jennifer coz I hate her.

Amanda (age 6)

Dear God,

Please send Dennis to a different camp this year. Please. Please.

Peter (age 7)
 

Prime Minister Mori was given some basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets with President Bill Clinton. The instructor told Mori " Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Clinton, please say ‘how are you’. Then Mr Clinton should say

"I am fine, and you ?" Now you should say ‘me too’. Afterwards we translators will do all the work for you." It looks quite simple, but the truth is …

When Mori met Clinton, he mistakenly said "Who Are You ?". Mr Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor : "Well, I am Hilary’s husband, ha ha…" Then Mori replied confidently "Me too, ha ha ha.."

Then there was a long silent moment in the meeting room.